i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
