Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
