Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Randomize
