I just made out with a guy for $7.
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
This is the second time you've stolen a pet when you're drunk, given it back and cashed in on a reward...I think you have a problem
Gotta pay my student loans some way
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
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