If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
