Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
thus making me awesome and them whores
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
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