If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
Heard at work: Get out of my face before I cuntpunch you so hard your granddaughters have miscarriages. I love my job.
I'm moving there. Get me hired.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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