youre lurking in front of me
dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
