i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Randomize
