we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize