i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
Randomize
