they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
the highlight of my day was when my dad called me when I was watching porn and I muted it instead of pausing it.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
how do flat chested girls get laid?
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
And the cops told us we were all naked.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize