After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
She told me I should be a condom model.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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