I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
