She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
Randomize
