When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
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