let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Randomize
