What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
Randomize
