You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
Randomize