There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
