I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
Randomize