dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
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