it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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