Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
Randomize
