The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
operation have a gay friend backfired
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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