I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Randomize
