i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
