yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Randomize
