Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
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