dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
Randomize
