JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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