I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Oh god it's open bar.
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