Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
