very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
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