remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Randomize
