Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
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