STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
Randomize
