Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Randomize
