Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Randomize