Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize
