Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
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