Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
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