who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
Randomize
