Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
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