I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
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