so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
Everyone is drunk but me. Fantastic. Everyone is hooking up but me. Awkward.
I had a pitcher of margaritas. Now I'm in a laundry room being a 5th wheel and crying. I made myself a bed out of a pool floatie. I win.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Randomize
