If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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