i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
