this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize