I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
My girlfriend went down on me and as she did she hummed the theme from star wars and pretended my dick was a lightsaber...I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Randomize