You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
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