i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
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